Why has this happened?

We often hear parents ask "Did I do something wrong...is this my fault?"

Being transgender is just who your child is. It is not caused and cannot be ‘prevented,’ just like your gender ‘is what it is’. Approximately 1% of the population are transgender.

The fact that your child felt able to tell you they are trans, suggests to us that you are an amazing parent!

If your child is very distressed or troubled about their gender identity there is help available. In the first instance contact your GP.

Under 18s: The GP will refer to the highly specialist Gender Identity Development Service (GIDS) at the Tavistock and Portman NHS Foundation Trust who will work with the whole family. It is often also beneficial (and advised by the Tavistock) for GPs to also refer to a Child and Adolescent Mental Health Service (CAMHS) to ensure your child receives emotional support to look after their wellbeing. 

Over 18s: The GP will refer to the Tavistock and Portman NHS Foundation Trust: Gender Identity Clinic for Adults. To ensure your child receives appropriate support to look after their emotional wellbeing, you can ask your GP for guidance on referring to local adult psychological services.

It’s vital that trans young people feel supported and are seen as individuals when they seek help. Unfortunately, not all GPs are understanding and some of our youth group members have told us some very dismissive and discriminatory responses they received when they first came out to their doctor.

Remember you have every right to request a different GP if you find your child is not receiving the support they need and deserve.

Proud Parent group member 2018:

“I have struggled to see them as a different gender to the one they were born with.  I am getting better, it seems to come together in your head as time goes by.”


Please be assured, whatever you are feeling right now is ok and there is plenty of support available to help you through this journey.  

Please do get in touch if you’d like to speak to our qualified parent worker for information, advice and guidance:  Nicki Ryan 07884 425408 | Nicki@free2b-alliance.org.uk 

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